British Style: Mission For Change
by yellow blaze
Summary: HumanAU: Arthur is halfway through his freshman year of high school when he realizes he might be letting life pass him by since all he does is schoolwork on the weekends. Opting to take advantage of the realization, Arthur is determined to make friends before the end of the year. But that's rather difficult when people only travel in groups.
1. An Attempt

To anyone who may be reading this and may find it familiar/similar to another story on this site:

This is a re-write of a set of stories that I had put up a few years ago. But in the past few years, my writing style has changed, and those stories were so full of grammar/continuity issues, so I am opting to rewrite them out. Once I have them started, I will be more than likely removing the old ones.

* * *

.

.

Arthur leaned against his locker in the hallway, holding a single notebook in one hand. No point in getting to class any earlier than he had to be. He would just act like he was waiting for someone and watch the crowd pass him by. _And maybe I can feel a bit… normal for once._ He scowled momentarily, as familiar words echoed in the back of his head. _Just shut them out. Don't listen._ Arthur shook his head and pushed himself off the locker, determined to head for the classroom before his mood could worsen.

The freshman year was only halfway through, and already Arthur was sick of it, though it wasn't for any reason that he could blame on someone else, unfortunately. _Just my own dumb fault. As usual._ He pushed open his classroom door, putting on a smile for the teacher, "Good morning."

"Good morning, Arthur."

He walked by the teacher and sat at his desk by the far windows. He'd ended up a few minutes early anyway. There wasn't any other student in the classroom yet. Just as well. It made it easier to get to his desk without having to push past any group of friends that would be standing in one spot. _There is a time for talking to friends, and it is_ _ **not**_ _in the classroom._ Arthur opened his notebook and flipped it to the first blank page, calmly waiting for the class to begin.

They should be covering yesterday's lecture again. The teacher had said it would be on the test, so she wanted to go over it one more time to make sure nobody had any questions. The classroom door opened again and the other students started coming in, talking more than they were moving, as usual. Arthur rolled his eyes and looked out the window, barely hearing the teacher trying to get the other students to sit down so she could begin. _Every morning it's the same. Nothing ever changes._

That wasn't to say Arthur didn't have friends of his own to talk to. Well… one friend anyway. Roderich who was on the student council with him was the only person Arthur could really call a friend. _Are we even friends though? It seems more as if we just tolerate one another. What do friends do again? What do they even talk about?_ Arthur frowned slightly, tapping his pencil on the paper as the teacher started writing on the board. _Do they hang out outside of school?_ He and Roderich definitely didn't. Arthur's gaze shifted to the student next to him who was whispering to the friend in front of him about their plans for the day. _Is this what friends do?_

.

.

* * *

"Roderich…" Arthur paused by the student council room to find the other member putting a file into the cabinet, "Can I ask you a question?"

"If it can't wait." Roderich commented, not even sparing the blonde a glance from another folder he was looking at, "I'm trying to get this mess cleaned up again. I don't know who keeps tossing these around everywhere, but I swear if I ever catch them…"

Arthur cast a glance over the papers that were scattered around on the floor, "It can probably wait. It's just something I was wondering about." He picked up the papers nearest to him and laid them on the table, not bothering to fix the order.

Roderich stooped over to pick up another file folder and shoved the papers back inside, "Oh? Normally you don't have a weight on your mind."

"… do friends get together outside of school hours?" Arthur asked, watching him shove the file into another drawer of their filing cabinet.

"Normally." Roderich raised an eyebrow at him, "Whatever it is they like doing I suppose. Walk in the park… going to the movies…" He shuffled some more papers together and looked back at Arthur in confusion, "Why do you ask?"

"… curiosity I suppose. I overheard someone talking in my first class about the plans they had made." Arthur handed an empty folder to Roderich.

"Well don't you?" Roderich asked, tilting his head as he took the folder from Arthur.

"…" Arthur stared at Roderich with a blank expression, "Don't I what?"

"… Don't you get together with anyone after school?" Roderich sighed.

"… no. I go home." Arthur frowned, "I have to do my homework after school."

"A valid point." Roderich shook his head, "But what about on the weekend then? What do you do during your spare time?"

"… study?" Arthur avoided the other's gaze this time, and bent over to pick up more papers off the floor, "I don't really go out at all, other than to school."

Roderich paused in the straightening of the room to look at Arthur in disbelief, "Well, when do you talk to your friends then?" He put both hands on his hips.

"… I'm… not sure I have one." Arthur's face reddened slightly, "If a friend is someone you talk to a lot… or hang out with… then I don't have someone like that." He offered a stack of papers out to Roderich, who ignored them in favor of staring at Arthur as if he had suddenly grown an extra head.

"Surely you're joking." Roderich stated flatly, "Not one?"

"… W-well it's not like I go anywhere." Arthur gave up on trying to hand Roderich the papers, and stacked them on top of the table instead, "I have to study… I try and help dad out by cleaning around the house while he's working…"

Roderich shook his head, "The house cannot possibly get that dirty in one day! Take a break and enjoy some sunshine once in a while! Life will pass you by if you're not careful!"

Arthur sighed and slid the last of the file folders across the table towards Roderich, "I don't particularly care for the movie theater anyway. It's always so loud. And going for a walk is pointless if you don't have a destination in mind."

"I take back what I said; I think life passed you by already." Roderich huffed and shoved the papers into the third drawer of the filing cabinet, "Honestly! Where on earth did you learn that all high school was meant to be was homework and studying?"

"… from my grandparents, though not in so many words. Studying comes first." Arthur answered with a shrug of his shoulders.

Roderich made a face and shot a look towards Arthur, "Your grandparents are the strict ones? What about your parents then?"

 _Right. I never told Roderich about that._ Arthur shrugged, "I don't know… dad's not strict. He just… he works a lot. Work comes first."

"Before his family?" Roderich stared at him incredulously, "What kind of father is that?"

"… It's just us. Him and me." Arthur answered flatly, "And I understand that work comes first."

"… You just said your grandparents are strict though? Where are they?" Roderich frowned slightly.

"Not living with us anymore." Arthur's face reddened again, "It doesn't matter anyway." He grabbed his notebook back up off the table and headed for the door, "I should get to my next class."

"Old habits die hard?" Roderich tilted his head as Arthur retreated out of the room.

.

.

* * *

He tapped his pencil on the surface of his desk, agitated. He should never have brought up the conversation. Hopefully Roderich would just forget about it. Arthur glanced down at his notebook, trying to re-read what he had written down for notes so far. Definitely not as much as the teacher had written on the board. _It's been a while since I told anyone about my grandparents though…_ Arthur frowned. Not since… middle school was it? Or perhaps not since elementary school even. _No… it was fifth grade. That's right. They left when I started middle school._

Arthur tapped his pencil against his chin, looking upwards towards the ceiling. _And yet… I'm still the same as I was. Schoolwork first… maybe Roderich is right. I should try living a little more. But it's not like I have anywhere to go or anyone to go with… so what's the point of that?_

He supposed that he could try to at least _make_ a friend… but… Arthur scowled to himself. This late in the school year? Friendships were usually formed within the first couple days right? It was far too late to be starting now! _I could just try saying hello to someone. But who would I talk to?_ Arthur snuck a few glances around him, hoping to see someone that he could strike up a conversation with. But doing so during class meant having to ask a question related to what the teacher was talking about.

Maybe the blonde next to him would be of help. Arthur regarded the male, trying not to be caught staring. He didn't seem to talk much to other people either. _I don't want to try talking to someone who has a lot of friends, so maybe someone like him would be the easiest type of person._ Arthur looked down at his notes again. He could try catching the blonde after class too, but what should he say? _I can't just say hello… that would sound strange… not to mention stupid._ Maybe he could ask for help studying? _Ugh. But I don't need help studying in this class. It's common sense._

"Alright, class, I think we'll stop there for today!"

"Huh?" Arthur blinked, looking at the board in surprise as she erased it. _Is class over already? Damn it! I missed the notes I was supposed to be taking!_ He frowned at his notebook for a moment. _Oh! I can use this opportunity!_ He stood up hastily and hurried after the blonde, frantically trying to remember his name, "Um… excuse me!"

"Hm?"

Arthur nearly jumped at the expression on the male's face. _Did I interrupt something? But he wasn't talking to anyone. He doesn't look very friendly!_ "S-sorry! Did you happen to get the last of the notes off the board? She erased it before I had finished writing it down!"

"Ach, ja. Here." The blonde passed his notebook to Arthur, "She did erase it rather fast."

"Too fast for me." Arthur sighed in relief and glanced down at the notes that he had taken. _His handwriting is really… neat. And small._ "Perfect, ah before I forget! When can I return this to you?"

The blonde paused, "Uhm… do we have another class together? I don't remember."

"Unfortunately, neither do I." Arthur sighed. _Well this was hopeless._ _So much for that idea._

"You can just give it to me at the end of the school day. I'll wait by the front doors for you." The blonde offered him a small smile.

"Oh! Thank you so much!" Arthur breathed a sigh of relief as the blonde went off in the opposite direction. _Perfect! And that will give me another opportunity to try a conversation!_ Arthur continued reading over the notes and paused at one of the lines. _'I have no idea what she said here.'_ _… well maybe I can copy some of my notes into his to return the favor._

.

.

* * *

Arthur seated himself at a small circular table near the back of the cafeteria. The farther away he was from most of the noise, the better. He rubbed his forehead, scowling. _Blast these headaches._ He sipped on his tea while copying notes from one notebook to the other, making sure he wasn't missing anything in either one. _This should help him out as well then._ _Though I still don't know what his name is…_

He glanced around the cafeteria, watching as empty chairs at other tables were slowly filled up one by one. Arthur was used to sitting by himself, so it didn't bother him anymore. _I just wish I could ask someone what that guy's name was. But how would I even describe him? Just describing him as tall, blonde, and slightly scary sounds rude._

"I don't care who you are, but I'm sitting over here!"

Arthur looked up in surprise when a tray banged down across from him, "… Ah. Hello." _Well so much for peace and quiet._ He stared at the newcomer to his table, whoever it was seemed to be in a bad mood. _Maybe I could use this opportunity to try and talking to him!_

"Hi." The male answered flatly. He seemed to be arguing with the plastic wrap around his fork (and losing by the looks of it).

"…Do you need help with that?" Arthur asked, hesitant to offer.

"I refuse to lose to this thing!" The stranger bit down on the plastic and tore at it with his teeth, finally succeeding in ripping open the packaging.

 _I suppose that's one way of doing it._ Arthur took another gulp from his bottle of tea and continued copying down the notes. _Oh. Ignoring him is rude though._ "… Why are you sitting over here?" _That question was rude. Way to go, self._

"Because the idiots at my usual table are annoying as hell. Make this less awkward for me, would you? What's your name again?"

"… Arthur." The blonde wondered where the other male usually sat. _I wonder what's wrong that he can't sit with them today? Maybe it's just because of his bad mood?_

"Lovino. Nice to meet you and all that crap."

Arthur stared at Lovino in confusion as the Italian went straight to eating his lunch, "… Ah. Likewise." He looked back down at the notebook and continued writing.

"Now _this_ is how a lunch should be spent. In a nice and quiet atmosphere." Lovino sighed in relief, "The idiots over there didn't know when to shut up."

 _I don't hear any peace and quiet._ Arthur kept the comment to himself, and only glanced up at Lovino to show that he had heard the other male.

After a few minutes, Lovino tilted his head, "Aren't you eating your lunch?"

"… not hungry." Arthur closed the notebook, finally done copying back and forth so both he and his blonde classmate would have the same notes written down. "You're welcome to it if you want it. I just wanted the drink."

"Seriously?" Lovino stared at him in disbelief, but he shrugged and reached over to help himself to the bread that was on Arthur's tray, "I'm not going to pass up free food."

.

.

* * *

 _Things are going good today. I have a potential friend to sit with me in the cafeteria, and I still don't know the blonde guy's name. I should introduce myself when I see him after school._ Arthur nodded to himself and headed for the front doors, spotting the other male almost instantly. _He's taller than most everyone else…_

"Have a good day, Ludwig!"

Arthur perked up slightly when he saw the blonde male waving to someone else who had run out the door, "Oh, that must be his name! What a relief!" He approached the male and offered the notebook, "Thank you for letting me borrow this!"

"No problem." Ludwig took the notebook, "I, ah, forgot to mention that I missed some of the notes, so my apologies on that."

"Oh it was no trouble. I copied mine into yours for you." Arthur responded hastily, "Consider it another thank you!"

Ludwig looked at Arthur in surprise, "Really? Thank you!"

 _I should say something else. But I don't know what else to say…_ Arthur mentally kicked himself, trying to hastily think of some conversation he could start up.

"This should help for tomorrow's test!" Ludwig looked through his notebook, "I was a little worried I would fail that part of it."

Arthur shifted his weight from one foot to the other, still not sure of what to say. _There must be something I can talk with him about… but I can't think of a single thing._ "Her tests are usually pretty simple, so I'm sure you wouldn't have had too much of a problem."

"Ach, not for me they're not." Ludwig sighed, "As soon as I start taking a test, I forget everything we've learned completely. Doesn't seem to matter how much I study the night before either."

"Really?" Arthur frowned, "I can usually get by on studying only for an hour or two."

"How do you study?" Ludwig looked at him in surprise.

"Ah… usually by looking over my notes… sometimes the chapter in the textbook depending on what we're going over…" Arthur tilted his head, "I don't think there's really anything else though."

"I should tell my brother to leave me alone so I can study. It would probably help more if I could concentrate." Ludwig frowned down at his notebook.

"… You have a brother?"

"Ja. Actually I have two." A scowl creased Ludwig's face for a moment before vanishing again, "But only my oldest brother lives with father and me."

 _Huh? His parents are living separate from one another, too?_ Arthur hesitated before offering, "W-would you like help studying? Maybe it would help you more if you had help going over it!"

"Really?" Ludwig's eyes widened, "If you wouldn't mind then! I'm sure father wouldn't mind me having anyone over!"

 _Ah. Perfect. I don't have to go home to an empty house._ Arthur sighed in relief, "Sure! I'll walk with you then."

.

.

* * *

Another reboot chapter done :D


	2. Giving Up Already

Arthur stood leaning with his head on his locker, forcing himself to take deep breaths. Deep… calming… breaths. _Okay. There's no need to overreact. Just relax…_ He straightened up again and continued walking down the hallway, trying to keep his head up so he wouldn't give off the impression that something was wrong. _I can handle this. Just one day at a time. Don't get overwhelmed._

He'd actually had _fun_ last night over at Ludwig's house. He wasn't quite sure what to make of the blonde's older (twin?) brother, but it was fun nonetheless. Their father was also more welcoming than the first impression Arthur had gotten. Apparently the not-friendly face was a genetic trait passed down through the family. So yes… yesterday had been fun… up until the moment he got home.

Arthur shuddered, remembering his confusion upon seeing another car in the driveway. Initially his first thought had been that his father, Aedan, had someone over from work… but no. It had to be the _rest_ of their family. They just showed up on the porch, no warning, no reason, nothing. They just showed up. Arthur cursed under his breath. _Why the bloody hell are they all here anyway? No warning, no phone call? They just decide to move here out of the blue for no reason?_ He pushed open the student council room and shut the door behind him, sinking to the floor, thankful that the room was empty.

 _Breathe… I am… calm._ Arthur held his head in both hands, feeling a headache coming back. _I am… not calm._ "Ugh." He forced himself to stand back up and staggered over to the table in the center of the room. "Breathe…" Arthur whispered to himself, "Just… breathe." _There's absolutely no reason to overreact. Everything will be fine._

At least that's what Aedan had told him the night before. Arthur hugged himself and glanced around the room in desperation, hoping to find something he could focus on rather than the thoughts in his head. _'We'll be fine. Don't worry. Look at it this way, we can be a family again.'_ Arthur gritted his teeth. _We_ _ **were**_ _a family. I was happy with it being just the two of us. These other people might as well be_ _ **strangers.**_

Arthur looked up towards the ceiling, watching the lights flicker periodically. "Calm… calm… I am _not calm._ "

.

.

 **Second Bell**

"Sorry I'm late." Arthur walked into his history class, forcing a smile at the teacher.

"Where were you?" The teacher blinked at him in surprise, "I thought you were absent at first!"

"My apologies." Arthur continued smiling, "I'm afraid I got caught up with paperwork in the student council room and lost track of time."

"Oh, that's alright." The teacher shuffled papers around on her desk and handed a test to Arthur, "Here you are."

"Thank you." Arthur took the test and headed to his seat, noticing Ludwig was giving him a look of concern. _I probably don't look the best._ He sat down, focusing in the paper in front of him. _This would be easier if the words would stop moving._ Arthur scowled and filled in his name at the top of the form. At least he could answer _that_.

"Arthur, are you okay?" Ludwig whispered, keeping his voice low so the teacher wouldn't hear him.

"I'm fine." Arthur responded hastily, "I just didn't sleep well." He looked back to the test, tapping his pencil agitatedly on the paper. _Calm. Stay… calm._ The lights flickered above them and Arthur cursed under his breath.

"Hm?" The teacher looked up, "That was strange. They're not calling for storms at all."

"Cool! Hey if the power goes out, does that mean we don't have to take the test?"

Ludwig sighed and shook his head, "Of course we still have to take it. There would still be light enough to see by!"

"What Mr. Beilschmidt said." The teacher made a face and turned back to face her class, "There's plenty of daylight outside. I don't understand why the lights are flickering."

Arthur buried his face in his hands, trying to block out the noise from around him. _There's only a couple people talking… why does it sound so damn loud in here?_

"Uhm…" Ludwig shot another worried glance towards Arthur, noticing the smaller blonde was shaking slightly, "A-are you sure you're okay?"

"Hm? Ludwig, is something wrong?" The teacher whispered, leaning over his desk.

"Uh… not with me." Ludwig looked between the teacher and Arthur.

"Oh?" She lifted her head to look at Arthur, "Uh… Arthur… are you not feeling well?"

"I'm fine!" Arthur spoke up hastily, lifting his head quickly. _Too_ quickly. "Ugh." Arthur leaned over his desk and started coughing.

"AH! Don't get sick in here!" The teacher yelped, "Mr. Beilschmidt, could you please take Arthur down to the nurse's office?"

Ludwig stood up hastily and pulled Arthur from his seat and out into the hallway, "Why did you come to class if you're not feeling well?"

Between coughs, Arthur shot him a half-glare, "I felt _fine_ before I went in there. Ugh." He leaned against the wall, pressing his forehead against the cold metal of one of the locker doors.

Ludwig looked up and down the hallway in a panic, "Sh-should I carry you?"

"I have my pride. I'll walk." Arthur scowled, but leaned on Ludwig as they continued moving down the hallway.

"UGH!"

Arthur winced at the familiar exclamation and looked down the hallway they were passing, where Roderich was glaring into the student council room, "…"

"Is something wrong?" Ludwig called to him.

"This room is a _disaster_ again!" Roderich looked at both of them, appalled, "I just cleaned this up yesterday!"

"Ach…" Ludwig gave him a look of sympathy, "Sorry to hear that…"

"Huh?" Roderich blinked at the two of them, "Wait, Arthur, are you okay?"

"Why does everybody keep asking me that?" Arthur hung his head in dismay.

"Because you're obviously not!" Ludwig exclaimed.

"Well, good grief! Don't stand here talking to me then!" Roderich waved them off with both hands, "Shoo! Get down to the nurse's office!"

"Shouldn't he be in class?" Ludwig whispered.

"He has study hall." Arthur muttered, "I told him he should just take the extra hour to sleep in but…" He paused to cough a few times, "We're behind on the student council paperwork…"

"There's no one else to help you two?" Ludwig asked softly.

"No. It's just the two of us on student council. Nobody else showed an interest in it." Arthur shrugged, "I wasn't all that interested either, I just wanted something to do after school until my father would get home from work." _Bad subject. Change the subject or you're going to blow the lights out._

Ludwig glanced upwards as the lights flickered again, "What keeps causing that?"

"Geez! We're going already!"

Ludwig and Arthur stared forward blankly as two males suddenly got shoved out into the hallway, with some teacher yelling after them before the door slammed shut (by the one male kicking it closed in anger).

"Oh _shut up_!" Lovino snapped at the door.

"…" Arthur glared up at the ceiling, for what reason, Ludwig didn't know.

"… In trouble?" Ludwig asked quietly.

"Huh? Yeah go… huh?" Alfred stared at the two of them, "Hey, what's wrong with Arthur?"

" _Nothing._ " Arthur hissed, "And would everybody quit asking me that!"

Ludwig stared in disbelief as the lights all went out with a series of popping sounds that echoed down the now-dark corridor. "That… was unfortunate timing."

"WHOA!" Alfred's voice could be heard from in front of them, "Hey cool! No power!"

"… wonderful." Lovino didn't sound near as thrilled.

"Oh great." Arthur buried his face in his hands. _Now I went and did it._

"Ah!" Ludwig jumped when he felt somebody latch on from behind, "Huh? Who's there?"

"S-sorry. I don't like the dark that much."

Arthur rolled his eyes, hearing Roderich's voice answer the taller blonde. "Right then. I'll just go to the nurse's office by myself, and you all can stay here and have a friendly discussion in the hallway." He pushed himself away from Ludwig and made his way down the hallway, keeping one hand on the wall.

"Would you get back here!" Roderich snapped from behind him.

 _No. I want away from this spot and away from_ _ **him**_ _._ Arthur gritted his teeth and kept walking, pressing himself against the wall. He hoped his footsteps couldn't be heard by Lovino and Alfred. _At least let me keep my pride a_ _ **little**_ _._

.

.

Arthur stared up at the ceiling, ignoring the muttering from the person sitting next to him. At least the nap had helped the headache. It didn't do much for anything else now that he was awake though. Arthur glared at Roderich, "Oh don't take it so personally. It wasn't you I was trying to get away from."

Ludwig looked from Roderich to Arthur in confusion, "Me?"

"Not you, either." Arthur said flatly.

Roderich huffed and crossed his arms, still looking rather offended, "Well, who then?"

Arthur bit his lip and looked away from the pair, staring at a spot on the wall. This conversation was really not a comfortable one to be having. _Ugh. All those unpleasant memories again._

Ludwig tilted his head, "One of the other two that were in the hallway? Lovino and …the blonde?"

"… Alfred." Arthur stated flatly, "His name is Alfred."

Roderich glanced at Ludwig in confusion, "What's wrong with him? I know he's quite… loud, but other than that, he seems nice enough."

Arthur's face flushed, "He's… nothing's wrong with him."

"Ah." Ludwig's face brightened somewhat, "A crush?"

Arthur didn't know if he should be horrified at the conclusion that Ludwig had come to, or amused at the expression on Roderich's face, which looked somewhere between horror and confusion. "No, Ludwig. Absolutely _not_. If you must know, the last time I spoke to him was probably fifth grade, and I don't care to speak to him now."

"Did you two not get along?" Ludwig asked, looking confused once more.

Arthur looked down at the blanket covering him and started plucking at it. He could feel his face starting to heat up again and scowled, "We got along… well enough… I suppose."

"This is confusing." Roderich sighed, "If there's nothing wrong with him, then why did you leave so fast earlier?"

"Because I don't want to talk to him!" Arthur snapped, "It's embarrassing alright?! All these years we haven't spoken was because of _me_."

"Ah." Roderich nodded once, "A fight then."

"Sure. Call it a fight." Arthur gave up and just waved his hand in dismissal, "I don't care what you call it. I'm just not talking to him."

Ludwig looked between Roderich and Arthur again, "I'm… confused. You seem like you care about him still… so why don't you talk to him? He seemed to be worried about you earlier."

"I… can't." Arthur spoke through gritted teeth, "Just let it _go_."

"I hardly have room to talk on the matters of not speaking to someone, so I'm not going to say anything more." Roderich huffed and leaned back in his chair.

 _Thank you_. Arthur shot him a grateful look, but Ludwig seemed less than willing to let the conversation drop.

"No." Ludwig said flatly, "If you can talk to him and nothing is preventing you from doing so, then talk to him."

Roderich stared at Ludwig in disbelief, "If he said he can't talk to Alfred, then why not just leave it at that?"

"Because I don't understand why he wouldn't!" Ludwig exclaimed, "If I had the chance to talk to someone, I would!"

 _I guess this is something he feels passionate about?_ Arthur scowled, "Well, I am not _you_. I'm not someone who can just walk up to someone and say hello!"

The lights above them started flickering again and Arthur buried his face in his hands, letting out a muffled groan of frustration. _Calm down. Calm down._

"Why does that keep happening?" Ludwig looked up at the lights in confusion.

"Something must be short-circuiting somewhere." Roderich sighed.

.

.

 **Third Bell**

Arthur sat at his seat, staring at the board with a glum expression on his face. Ludwig had agreed to drop the conversation, after some pleading from Roderich. _Hopefully he doesn't just bring it up again tomorrow. I don't think I could stand to talk about it._ Arthur rubbed his forehead, watching the teacher write out an equation on the board. There was never any fight had between him and Alfred… it was just… silence. Ever since the start of middle school, there'd been nothing but silence.

 _I wonder who changed… was it him? Or… maybe it was me?_ Arthur looked down at his notebook, frowning at the empty page in front of him. _I don't really remember it. Why did we just stop talking to each other anyway?_ _But I don't know if he'd… act normally around me. For that matter, why am I even trying to make friends? I don't want them thinking I'm a_ _ **freak**_ _._

That had been _one_ good thing about the rest of his family mysteriously showing up on their doorstep. At least he didn't feel as alone, but… _they can all control it._ Arthur scowled and started drawing small scribbles on the page. _Why am I the only one who can't control what I'm doing?_ Sooner or later, Roderich would realize that the person destroying the student council room was none other than Arthur himself. _And how would I bloody explain it to him anyway? He's not going to understand!_

The blonde sank in his seat, still drawing small scribbles on the paper. _And so it remains… halfway through the school year with no friends, because I don't want anyone to find out I'm not 'normal'._ He paused in his drawing to stare at the blackened notebook paper. _… I guess that answers that. Alfred didn't change. I did._ Arthur lifted his head to look back at the board. _It must be nice to be able to make friends like he does. Be able to spend time with them and have absolutely_ _ **nothing**_ _to worry about._

…

 _Must be real nice._


	3. Conversations During An Assembly

Trying to do an update a day, but that migraine last week knocked me out for three days, sorry about that.

* * *

.

.

Arthur idly stirred his tea with a spoon, glancing up now and then at his dad who was reading the newspaper while eating his breakfast. At least it was a quiet morning, first one in quite a few days. _Like how it used to be…_ Arthur glanced towards the front door, hearing a car, but it drove past the house. "…Where did they say they were going again?"

"Who can tell?" Aedan answered, taking a sip of his own blend of tea, "Your mother said something, but I couldn't understand her since she was halfway out the door already."

Arthur looked up at the clock. He knew the freshmen had an assembly first thing this morning, but the other students still had to be in their classes, right? _And this meeting is supposed to be for all students, so I would assume then that they have their own assemblies after us._ He frowned slightly. It seemed kind of strange that freshmen would get the assembly before the upperclassmen. Normally it was the other way around.

"What's the big assembly for anyway? Did you overhear anything?" Aedan laid the newspaper down on the table and cast a curious glance at his son.

Arthur shook his head, "Nothing came through student council. I thought I heard one of the teachers mention it was a new principal… but nobody's announced anything directly to us."

"Huh… I wonder what happened to the old one?" Aedan took another sip of his tea, furrowing his brow as he gazed in the direction of the front door.

"I think our school failed another inspection." Arthur commented.

"…What… did they buy now?"

Arthur raised an eyebrow and followed his dad's gaze to the group getting out of the car that had just pulled up, "… Did they buy breakfast?"

"Oops." Aedan's face reddened, "Is that what she said?"

Arthur made a face and hastily cleared the empty plates off the table, sliding them on the shelf underneath the phone, "Maybe they won't notice."

"They'll notice the lack of appetite." Aedan commented flatly, "I'm not hungry in the slightest."

"W-well maybe they won't have bought that much… it probably just looks that way because there's a lot of them carrying the bags!" Arthur suggested hopefully.

"… You don't really believe that." Aedan shot him a sideways glance.

"Not in the least." Arthur hung his head and let out a heavy sigh.

.

.

* * *

 _Well hopefully no one discovers the stash of food in the bottom of the cabinet._ Arthur made a face as he walked through the hallway. It had been no small feat making the food 'disappear' off his plate, the trick was getting it to land someplace that no one would notice what he was doing. Aedan had caught on rather fast, but the only comment that the blonde had gotten was a quiet "can you do mine, too?"

"They've really got to communicate better." Arthur sighed and leaned against his locker. There wasn't much point in getting any textbooks out if they had an assembly. _And how long is this going to be? I don't know if I should grab my second bell books… or my third bell books… or anything!_ He frowned and looked up the hall towards the auditorium. He _could_ just swing back down to his locker and grab whatever was necessary for his next class after the assembly let out…

Deciding that that was the better option, Arthur nodded to himself and put his backpack into the locker, heading up to the auditorium empty-handed. No point in carrying everything with him if he didn't know if he would even be using it or not. _I think any other day I would be hoping this thing would drag on all day so I could just go home afterwards but…_ Arthur thought to the used-to-be-quiet household and sighed again. _I don't think I want that. I'd rather be here._

There wasn't anything _wrong_ with the other half… three-quarters of his family. It's just he had grown up with only having his dad around, so that was what he was used to. Peace and quiet. No banging of doors, no yelling about someone switching the tv channel… no redhead twins constantly arguing, bickering, or teasing either each other or him. Arthur scowled at the last thought. _If they would just leave me alone, I would be ecstatic._

And to make things worse (or more confusing), his mother _still_ hadn't said why they had just up and moved there in the first place! _You'd think she'd at least have given dad a little warning._ Arthur sat in the back row of the auditorium, watching as other students would slowly mill in. It had been an option that they could go to their first class and wait to be called down to the auditorium, or just head straight to the auditorium. _No point in going to a class that's not going to be held._ Arthur slumped down in his chair. _Now, see? If you had friends, you could be sitting with someone right now. But no._ The blonde rolled his eyes and sighed. _Way to go, idiot self._

.

.

Much to his surprise, Ludwig joined him when the speaker started calling for everyone's attention. "Did you just now get here?" Arthur looked up at Ludwig in surprise.

"Ja, my oldest brother was running a little late this morning. He's nearly impossible to get out of bed." Ludwig sighed and dropped into the seat next to Arthur, "Even with two alarms set, and our vater yelling at him, he still manages to sleep through everything."

"He must be a hard sleeper." Arthur commented, "That's rather incredible, actually. I wouldn't mind being able to sleep that well."

"…You don't sleep well?" Ludwig tilted his head.

"I'm a light sleeper." Arthur made a face, "The slightest noise can wake me up, even if it's just someone walking down the hall outside my room."

"Ach." Ludwig winced in sympathy.

"Attention, may I have everyone's attention please?"

"Please let this be fast, or Ardrich is going to fall asleep again, I know it." Ludwig whispered.

"As some of you may have heard, the person you knew as your principal, I sincerely doubt any of you knew his name even, is no longer working here at this school building. The position will be taken over by myself, but hopefully I don't have to see any of you down there on a regular basis. … Though looking at some of the records of the people in this room, I don't think that hope is going to last too long."

Arthur frowned slightly, "Well that's not a good way to start off. Don't start criticizing us already."

"… I wonder what he meant by that… are there people who go down there on a regular basis?" Ludwig tilted his head.

"I know what you're thinking: that the middle of the school year is entirely too late to be going over any rules or regulations, and that many of you have already learned them by now, whether by being told or finding out the hard way…"

"This is…" Ludwig started.

"Going to be ridiculously long." Arthur finished flatly, "He's going to be one of those speakers that can't get to the point, isn't he?"

.

.

* * *

"…and some of you may not even care."

Arthur blinked a few times, staring up at the ceiling. _I wonder how many lights are in here?_ _One… two… three…_ He counted to the end of the row, squinting to make out the last couple that were farther away from him. _Alright then, so there's about seven lights in each row… and five rows… huh._ "Did you know there's thirty-five lights in here?" Arthur asked, looking at Ludwig.

"I was about to ask you if you were understanding what the point of all this was, but I guess I won't." Ludwig sighed. He glanced up at the ceiling as well, "Did you count the big lights or the spotlights?"

"The big lights. They're easier to see." Arthur looked back upwards, "I couldn't count the spotlights to the end of the row. I got to that one that has the crack running through it…" He pointed with his right hand off to Ludwig's right, "And then couldn't make out how many others there were."

"Ah, I think I can count them." Ludwig continued staring at the ceiling, and Arthur could see his lips moving silently as the blonde counted.

 _Not much else to count._ Arthur glanced around the room again. He supposed he could count the seats by the number of heads in a row… yes. That would work. He chose the row directly in front of them, and started mentally counting the backs of heads, turning his head to move up the row as he continued. _Eight… nine… ten…_

.

.

* * *

"I think I must have counted about sixty spotlights, give or take a few." Ludwig said finally.

"I lost track of seats after I realized that not all of them would have someone sitting in it." Arthur sighed, sitting with his head back against the seat, "This is boring as hell."

"I should have brought some cards along. We could play those awhile." Ludwig glanced around them, "Looks like everyone else has given up, too."

"… who was listening?"

"Hm?" Ludwig caught on to the tail-end of the new principal's message and blinked at the stage, "Uh…"

"Nobody." Arthur muttered.

"I say this to prove a point. If you cannot listen to someone who has authority over you, how do you hope to listen to those around you?"

"We were listening to ourselves just bloody well, thank you." Arthur grumbled, "Ugh. I should have brought a textbook in with me. I could be using this time to study or something."

"Ah, that would have been a really good idea." Ludwig agreed, "I have a test coming up soon. I should have thought of that."

The principal continued, "I'm willing to bet that there is not one person in here who can tell me what I said five minutes into what I was saying. If you can't spend more than five minutes listening to someone on a stage, how can you spend two minutes listening to someone in the hallway?"

"I don't think he was even listening to himself. We jumped from listening to a person of authority, to listening to a conversation in the hallway! How are we supposed to keep up with this?" Arthur sunk lower in his seat, "Honestly! I don't even _want_ to listen to this."

"… Who stands around to talk in the hallway?" Ludwig frowned, "We have to get to our classes!"

"Exactly." Arthur gestured at the taller blonde, "That, too."

"You're all teenagers. You all have your groups of friends, some smaller or bigger than others… but tell me, how many people in here, in the last week, have actually spoken to someone new? You spoke to someone you've never spoken to before? Show of hands?" The principal looked around the room, waiting for a response from his audience.

Arthur groaned but raised his hand along with Ludwig. "If I had known this was going to be one of those kinds of speeches, I think I would have stayed home." Arthur scowled.

"Ja, me too." Ludwig sighed, "I would have let Ardrich sleep."

"That's actually more than I was expecting. Good for you all who raised your hands." The principal nodded to the students with their hands raised, "The rest of you are either too scared to raise your hands for whatever reason, or you just believe in sticking with your normal group of friends. Either one is fine, it doesn't much matter. But while you are talking to your friends in the hallway, in the classroom, or even on the way home… how many of you notice the people around you? The ones _not_ in your circle?"

"… Circle?" Ludwig asked, looking at Arthur in confusion.

"I don't even have a bloody circle of friends!" Arthur made a face, "Who the hell has that many friends?"

"I don't…" Ludwig frowned and tilted his head, "Why would all of you be standing in a circle anyway? And are you in the center or in the ring itself?"

"Hell if I know." Arthur grumbled, "I've never had enough friends to even _make_ a circle."

The principal looked around the room again before shaking his head, "Just think of your first class for instance. I know for a fact, that there are students in this school who have divorced or single parents, how many of you know someone in this auditorium now who does not have both parents to go home to after school?"

Arthur raised his hand again, "Well, you can count for that one."

"Can I raise my hand if I know Ardrich goes home to a single parent?" Ludwig made a face, "Or doesn't that count since he's family?"

"He never specified." Arthur commented.

"Ah, that's true." Ludwig raised his hand.

"Those of you with your hands raised, how many of you have single parents yourselves?"

Arthur put his hand back down, though he scowled. _I_ _ **used**_ _to have a single parent. Up until last week!_

Ludwig looked up at his own hand then back at the principal again, "How long do I have to keep my hand up?"

" _All_ students with single parents, raise your hands."

"A little longer apparently." Arthur grinned at Ludwig, who was scowling at the stage now, "You can hang in there!"

"Again, proving my point. Some people, that did not raise their hands when I asked who knew someone with single parents, are even sitting next to those with their hands up. This is what I meant. You have grown up in an environment that teaches you to stay inside your comfort zone. You grow up talking to the same people and never look beyond that. People of habit." The principal shook his head again.

"… I don't think that applies to me. I grew up talking to… hardly anybody." Arthur made a face.

"It is still a habit though. You're just in habit of not talking." Ludwig pointed out, "Und the same with me. I concentrate on my learning while I am in school, and homelife while I am at home. Cleaning the house… making supper for when vater gets home…"

"… You cook?" Arthur looked at Ludwig in surprise.

"Ja. Ardrich's cooking is awful, so I've taken over." Ludwig smiled.

The principal hesitated before leaning in to talk to the microphone once more, "On a more serious note, how many students in here know someone who tried to take their life?"

Ludwig's jaw dropped in horror, "Nein! Who would do that?!"

 _Uh…_ Arthur hesitated. Well… he knew of _one_ person. Arthur sighed and put his hand back up in the air, getting a shocked look from Ludwig in response. "Don't ask." Arthur said flatly.

"Now I can understand if you don't want to answer this, but how many people in here have actually tried?"

Ludwig looked up when Arthur didn't put his hand down, and looked back at Arthur's face again, "… Seriously?"

"It's not like it's a subject to joke about." Arthur commented.

"When did…?" Ludwig tilted his head, but the question trailed off.

"Hmm… I think it was… last year? Or maybe the year before. I don't rightly recall." Arthur frowned as he tried to remember, "My memories are a bit fuzzy from that timeframe."

"Why are they fuzzy?" Ludwig whispered.

"… Doctor had a way of describing it… I think he said it was something like the brain's self-defense mechanism? Whatever it was that was causing the heavy amount of stress just got blocked out completely or something."

"… so you have amnesia?" Ludwig blinked.

The principal continued talking, "Imagine for one minute, if all those students who just had their raised were not here. If everyone in this room who had tried had succeeded, how much smaller your class year would be."

"Only for a certain timeframe. I haven't the faintest idea why or what happened though. I just know I woke up in the hospital and the nurse told me they almost lost me." Arthur made a face.

"What a horrible thing to wake up to! Especially with no memory of anything happening!" Ludwig exclaimed.

"You're telling me. It still bugs the hell out of me that I can't remember what happened." Arthur frowned.

"Out of… curiosity." The principal waved both arms again, "How many students in here… have been in the hospital for a serious affliction, self-caused or otherwise?"

Arthur put his hand back up again, "I really wish I could remember. Dad won't tell me what happened. He said if it gets to a point where I can recall it on my own, then he'll know I can handle finding out about it. But until then, he wasn't going to say anything, because he wasn't sure how I would react."

"Ah… he's trying to protect you." Ludwig whispered, barely listening to the principal.

"I guess… though I can't think of anything that would have caused that…" Arthur tilted his head, furrowing his brow, "I want to remember… but I can't."

I'm probably going to regret asking, but of those of you who do _not_ have your hands raised, take a look around you, and raise your hand if you knew about at least _one_ of these people." The principal took another glance around the room, waiting to see how many hands went up.

Arthur kept his hand up, knowing full well that the other person would have had their hand up, "It's just frustrating."

Ludwig looked back up at Arthur's hand, "Who…" He started.

"The person who I know tried to commit suicide would have been in the hospital." Arthur commented, "And he was in there for some time actually."

The principal nodded before continuing, "A few people… so about half the room has their hands raised right now… your class year could have easily been half the size it is now. And none of you… would have noticed."

Arthur made a face and put his hand back down, "This subject is rather uncomfortable."

"I can imagine why, after hearing that." Ludwig frowned, "So you don't have any recollection at all of actually trying to…"

"None whatsoever." Arthur frowned, "Dad told me I had tried actually. The doctor let him tell me. I don't get it… it must have happened last year because I don't remember most of seventh grade or eighth. It wouldn't make sense if I'd done whatever it was in seventh grade and then not remember the eighth grade…"

"Ja." Ludwig nodded in agreement, "So whatever happened, happened while you were in eighth grade."

"But what the bloody hell was it?" Arthur made a face.

The principal let out an audible sigh before continuing once more, "I can pretty much guarantee, that out of everyone that does not have their hand raised, you might have _wondered_ for about five minutes, but then the thought would have left your mind. Either with the assumption that they moved or transferred, but never would this thought have occurred to you. …Of the students who had their hands raised… how many of you can _honestly_ say that you are still here, because of the actions of someone else?"

Arthur raised his hand once more, "This line of questioning is also really annoying. How many times am I going to have to raise my hand?"

"You could probably leave it up and he'd never even notice." Ludwig commented.

"Ugh, by the same thought process, I could leave my hand _down_ and he'd never notice." Arthur sighed.

"Those of you who have your hands up, more than I expected again honestly, how many of you are here because of the actions of someone else, from the most recent time you were hospitalized?"

Arthur shrugged and put his hand back down, "Forget it. I'm not going to keep holding my hand up in the air."

"… You would have been the only one." Ludwig commented, looking around the room.

"All the more reason for me to keep it _down_! I'm not going to be the only person with his hand up in this room full of people! That's bloody embarrassing!" Arthur exclaimed.

The principal gestured to the entire room, "This is not only disappointing… it's _sad_. Because that means of all of you who had your hands up, you did not have a friend to help you, and you didn't even have a family member."

"… well you had a family member at least." Ludwig whispered.

"And I shall keep that comment to myself." Arthur muttered.

"So I ask again, who would have noticed? Who can honestly stand up and tell me, you would have noticed that something was wrong?" The principal paused and glanced around the room, focusing his attention on the right side of the room.

"Hm?" Arthur squinted through the darkness, "Did someone actually stand up?"

"Oh hello." The principal wandered over to the right side of the stage, "And why would you have noticed?"

"… Was he… expecting that answer?" Ludwig whispered.

"He was certainly looking more to that side of the room, wasn't he?" Arthur tilted his head, "But how could he possibly know?"

The student answered after being handed the microphone: "Because we're people of habit. I honestly could not tell you their names, but I could tell you their absence would be obvious. I pass the same people every day to classes. I know who to expect in the hallway while I'm walking, because they always stand at the same spot, with the same people, every day."

"… the same people stand in the hallway to have a conversation that they can be having after school?" Ludwig looked back at Arthur in confusion.

"These are the people that constantly make it so hard to get to our classes!" Arthur complained, "Honestly! Just save it for after school and keep moving!"

"Thank you. So one student… one person out of this entire room would have noticed. That is… sad." The principal repeated his earlier words, ""So now I ask you not to remember what I said at the beginning of this… or to remember what I said in the middle. But if you take nothing else from this room… remember what I am telling you now."

"… One?" Arthur looked around the auditorium in shock, "Not one other person would have noticed it?"

"Well, he's going off the idea that if someone we don't know is lost, either in an accident or by taking their life, that we wouldn't notice. If it was someone we knew personally, then of course we would notice their absence." Ludwig frowned, "At least I hope that's what he was saying."

"… If he was saying we wouldn't even notice if someone we spoke to on a regular basis stopped coming to school, that would be rather harsh, not to mention rude." Arthur whispered.

.

.

* * *

For those of you reading 'awesome style' you may have already realized what happened a year ago. If you haven't read it (or even if you have and didn't figure it out or remember it), it will be mentioned later, or you can leave a review and ask.


End file.
